My husband was diagnosed with Parkinson's three years ago. Lately, I've noticed he's becoming frustrated when getting dressed, especially when dealing with buttons. He's always been independent and I don't want to make him feel worse by suggesting he needs help. Any advice?
- Margaret, Ohio
Nurse Taylor: Margaret, this is such a common experience for those caring for loved ones with Parkinson's. Your sensitivity to your husband's independence speaks volumes about your respect for his dignity.
Fine motor challenges are a natural part of Parkinson's progression, and frustration during dressing is often one of the first signs. Rather than framing this as "needing help," I suggest introducing adaptive options as "smart upgrades" that many people prefer for convenience.
Magnetic-closure shirts have been game-changers for many patients with Parkinson's or with any type of tremors. They look identical to traditional button-downs but use hidden magnets that connect with a simple touch. Many of our customers with Parkinson's tell me they appreciate how these shirts let them maintain their personal style while eliminating the frustration of buttons.
Remember, independence isn't about doing everything without assistance—it's about having control over how things get done. By introducing adaptive clothing as a tool that enhances independence rather than signaling decline, you're supporting his autonomy in a thoughtful way.
I've become my mother's caregiver, and every morning feels like chaos. We're both stressed before the day really begins. Any advice as to how I can make our mornings smoother?
- David, California
Nurse Taylor: David, the morning rush can be particularly challenging for caregivers. When we start the day feeling rushed or frustrated, it affects everything that follows.
First, give yourself permission to simplify. Many caregivers feel they need to maintain the exact same morning routine their loved one had when fully independent. Instead, identify what truly matters (hygiene, medication, nutrition) and streamline everything else.
Try preparing as much as possible the night before—laying out clothing, pre-setting the coffee maker, perhaps even preparing breakfast. This eliminates decision fatigue when you're both low on energy.
For many families I work with, changing the order of morning activities makes a significant difference. For example, if dressing is particularly stressful, consider handling hygiene and medication first, then having a calm breakfast before tackling clothing.
For many families I work with, changing the order of morning activities makes a significant difference. For example, if dressing is particularly stressful, consider handling hygiene and medication first, then having a calm breakfast before tackling clothing.
Prepare to be flexible. Some mornings might be better for her than others. This might impact her mood, ability and behavior. It’s your role to remain calm and comforting, and meet her where she is on that particular morning.
Finally, build in a buffer. Whatever time you think you need, add 15 minutes. This small cushion reduces pressure and creates space for the inevitable unexpected challenges.
My father-in-law moved in with us after his stroke, and I'm struggling with the bathroom routine. It feels awkward for both of us, but we don't have many options. How can I make this less uncomfortable?
- James, Florida
Nurse Taylor: James, the personal care aspects of caregiving can indeed create discomfort on both sides. Your awareness of this dynamic is already a step toward improving it.
Clear, matter-of-fact communication is your best tool here. Many caregivers find that using a gentle but straightforward approach normalizes these situations. Simple phrases like, "I'm going to help with your shower now" stated in a casual, routine way can reduce awkwardness.
Consider creating a consistent routine that becomes predictable. Our brains find comfort in patterns, and knowing exactly what to expect can reduce anxiety for both of you.
Privacy modifications can make a significant difference too. Even small adjustments like a shower chair positioned to maintain some visual privacy, or a partial screen and extra towels can preserve dignity while ensuring safety.
Remember that adaptive clothing can make bathroom visits easier as well. Pants with side zippers or specialized designs for those with limited mobility (like our CareZips) can reduce the assistance needed and increase independence in the bathroom.
Many caregivers tell me that what initially felt uncomfortable eventually becomes routine with time and consistent approach. Be patient with yourself and your father-in-law as you develop your new normal.
I care for my wife who has advanced rheumatoid arthritis. While I'm happy to help her with anything she needs, I'm a bit worried I'm not taking good enough care of myself. By evening, I'm completely exhausted. Any advice?
- Robert, Michigan
Nurse Taylor: Robert, your question touches on perhaps the most important aspect of caregiving that too often goes unaddressed. Caregiver burnout is real, and prevention is infinitely easier than recovery.
The first step is to recognize that self-care isn't selfish—it's essential maintenance for someone in a helping role. Think of it like the airplane oxygen mask instruction: you need to secure your own before helping others.
Start by identifying small pockets of time—even 10-15 minutes—that can be entirely yours each day. Use this time for something that rejuvenates you, whether that's reading, a short walk, or simply sitting quietly with a cup of tea
Next, look for ways to simplify caregiving tasks that create the most strain. For example, many of our customers find that adaptive clothing significantly reduces the physical and emotional energy required for dressing assistance. Magnetic shirts and side-zip pants can transform a 20-minute struggle into a 5-minute routine, saving precious energy for both of you.
Most importantly, connect with others in similar situations as well as your friends, family and neighbors who are ready and willing to help out. Whether through a formal support group or online community, sharing experiences with those who truly understand can provide both practical solutions and emotional relief. Your support team is there, and you’ll be surprised at how willing they’ll be to help out– maybe a neighbor can assist in taking out your garbage or a family member can swing by for an hour while you take a nap. All you have to do is ask.
Remember, Robert—sustainable caregiving is a marathon, not a sprint. The small investments you make in your own wellbeing directly enhance your capacity to care for your wife with patience and compassion.
Dress Easy, Be Happy
Taylor
Nurse Taylor is Joe & Bella's Chief Customer Happiness Officer and a registered nurse with years of experience in geriatric care. Please your caregiving questions to hello@joeandbella.com for consideration in future columns.
Your design team knocked it out of the park! I never thought adaptive clothes could be so fashionable.
